Celia... This Is So Hard!

If you had a conversation with me, or took a class from me, you know I don't use the word "hard." I hear it all the time from students and friends: "practice is so hard... life is so hard..." It seems that, as we approach the end of the year, the words "it's so hard" are used with greater frequency. One of my favorite teachers actually posted about Yoga being so hard in the eyes of students. Well, as I like to say to my groups: life is hard, why would Yoga be any different? The bigger question though is, why do we think this whole business of life should be easier? Where is it written this is a walk in the park? What does the word "hard" really mean?

For some reason, religious or social, we grow up under the impression that, if we do the right things, and behave certain ways, and say the right positive affirmations, life is going to be just easy... a trip through the land of fairies. By the way, that belief transfers to yoga too - if we practice every day, and pay attention to bandhas, and practice our research postures correctly, our practice moves forward and upward constantly till we transcend into this perfect yogi. Well, let me share something pretty interesting with you... that's not so.

I like to refer back to perception every time I think of this idea of things being "hard." Our perception, which is built upon our beliefs and past experiences, colors most of our judgements. That's why the question "what does the word hard really mean?" What seems to be hard for me may not be so for somebody else. We see so much of this in the yoga room - kapotasana is so "hard" for me, but for the person on the next mat it's just one of those enjoyable postures! In life, this is not different. We perceive things to be "hard" when we believe we can't do them while others apparently can, and with ease. Perhaps, if we can change our perception, then we can change the word "hard" to "challenging" instead, and face life as an interesting moment in our existence.

Months ago, I had an encounter with a student, and she told me that my classes are too "hard." Well... I smiled and did not tell her what I was thinking, but it prompted a series of thoughts on the subject. Why do we live under the impression that everything should be easy all the time? Some things are inherently easy; for example, to eat a delicious bowl of fresh fruit is easy; or to watch Outlander on a lazy Sunday afternoon; or to sit under a tree and enjoy birds singing all around. Those things are easy. What about getting up in the morning to go to work? It depends... if I perceive my job as horrible, not easy, or if I suffer with depression, not easy at all. However, if I'm somewhat content with the prospect of the day ahead of me, then it's easy to get out of bed, even on Monday morning! As a general rule though, life challenges us more than bringing us pleasant experiences throughout the day. Some of the challenges we can overcome quite easily, and some of them may trigger the regular reaction "this is so hard!" The trick is to find a balance when judging those moments we consider impossible, unpleasant... or challenging, and face them for what they are - moments of learning and growth. Cheesy I know, but true. There's no growth without a challenge, and we see this pretty clearly through our yoga practice. If you want to stand on your head, you have to go through all the prep work required to take you to that posture, and sometimes that is just grueling. No... that is just challenging!

As Christmas approaches, people all around seem to be more and more frazzled, facing challenges in traffic, at work, in relationships, in keeping up with what's expected of them. We fall under the spell of the demands around us, mostly created by us, and we label life as "hard." Maybe a change in perspective, and wording, is in order: life is what it is, neither hard nor easy; we all go through challenging moments, and that's what they are - CHALLENGING. It brings a totally different feel to the experience, doesn't it? There's room for a lot of movement within "challenging," whereas "hard" is pretty set in stone. "Challenging" keeps us curious, playful, involved... it keeps this whole business of life as a video game where sometimes we get all the gold coins, and sometimes we fall into the crocodile's mouth, having to restart. Challenging... This is so challenging...

Happy Solstice everyone!

Walk in Beauty!